Edna Villalobos, 26, a beneficiary of the Pantawid Pamilyang Pilipino Program from Brgy. Halayhayin in Pililla, Rizal Province, shares that she has long suffered from physical abuse at home. However, through the Family Development Sessions (FDS) she attends to as a beneficiary of the program and counseling with her husband, her sufferings have ended. Now, she is grateful that finally, her husband is as eager as her in dreaming for their three children and is making his ways (through working hard in the farm) to make their home happier and their lives better.***

 

 

 

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KNOWING HER RIGHTS, ENDING HER PAINS

 

For a 26-year-old mother who started a family early, finally being able to afford a set of plastic table and chairs for their home is a great accomplishment already.

But when she saw her property broken into pieces, it’s as if her world has broken, too.

“Naaawa na kasi ako sa mga anak ko na sa sahig na lang kumakain, o nag-aaral. Gusto ko naman sana may maayos kaming mapagkainan at sila ay makapag-aral nang mas maayos,” shared Edna Villalobos, a beneficiary of the Pantawid Pamilyang Pilipino Program.

According to her, when their family became a beneficiary of the program in 2012, she has gained enough savings to finally buy a table and four chairs for their small home in Brgy. Halayhayin, Pililla, Rizal Province.

However, when she and her husband got into a fight one day, she was hit with the table, and then the chairs. She later saw her investment in pieces, her head and her whole body hurting.

That particular incident may have been serious, but it wasn’t her first time experiencing physical violence from her husband. Edna related how for several years already, she has been enduring abuse, especially when he is drunk.

Gratefully, according to Edna, she learned to fight for her right as a woman, thanks to the Family Development Sessions (FDS) of the Pantawid Pamilya program.

 

The end of violence

Edna admitted that her lack of education made her accept her situation without questioning her husband. She only finished grade school.

The new knowledge she acquires from the monthly FDS opened her eyes and helped her end her pains.

The FDS is a component of the Pantawid Pamilya program that gathers parent-grantees monthly to teach family enhancement topics such as strengthening marital relationships, children and women’s rights, budget management and disaster preparedness among others. Attendance to the said sessions is one of the co-responsibilities of parent-grantees as beneficiaries of the program.

“Natutunan ko sa FDS ang karapatan ko bilang isang babae at ang pag-aasikaso sa aking sarili,” she shared.

Edna added that without the FDS, she would have not learned that she is already being abused and would have not found the confidence to do something about it.

So that day, when she saw her table and chairs broken, Edna became firm that the situation has to end. She went to the police to finally file a report against her husband. Through the counseling of their Municipal Link and social workers from the local social welfare and development office, Edna’s life has changed.

Luckily for Edna, it is not only his husband’s violence that has ended. It’s also her husband’s doubts on the Pantawid Pamilya program, which helped her fulfill their responsibilities with the program and eventually with their three children.

 

The start of a better tomorrow

Edna could never be happier being able to have peace of mind at home. However, she cannot hide how she is more grateful that her husband now shares her dreams for her children.

“Dati, balewala lang sa kanya kung pumasok o hindi ang mga anak namin. Ngayon, s’ya pa ang nagpapaalala araw-araw na gisingin nang maaga ang mga bata para makapasok sa school. Lagi n’ya na ring sinasabi sa kanila na pumasok sila para may bago silang matutunan,” Edna said.

Today, both of them are doing their best for their children. Looking at their house today, Edna is positive that they’re off to a good start.

“Dati, itong bahay namin ay plastik lang ang bubong. Kapag malakas ang hangin at umuulan, nababasa kami. Natutulog nang basa ang mga bata. Gamit ang extrang pera na naipon namin sa pagbenta ng saging, nakabili kami ng yero para maayos ang bahay namin. Ako mismo ang gumawa at nag-ayos nitong bahay para hindi na kawawa ang mga anak namin,” shared 31-year-old Joel, Edna’s husband.

Moving forward, Edna and Joel promise to support their children’s education.

According to Pililla Municipal Link Medel Andrade, Joel’s acceptance of the program helped the family, especially the children, in fulfilling their responsibilities with the program. Edna is continuously attending the monthly FDS without fear of her husband’s jealousy, which was one of the reasons for their quarrels before. Now, she gains new knowledge every time such as caring for their children that she eagerly shares with Joel, who only reached Grade 3.

“Sinisikap namin na mapagtapos sila ng pag-aaral. Noon, ‘pag walang trabaho ang asawa ko at wala silang maibaon, hindi na lang sila papasok. Pero ngayon, sa tulong ng Pantawid, lagi na silang nasa school. At nagsisikap kaming mag-asawa na makatapos sila kahit hanggang high school man lang para hindi na ganitong hirap ang maranasan nila,” she said.

Joel agrees with her. According to him, he and Edna have already experienced how difficult it is to earn money with their educational background and would never allow their children to have the same fate. With a bit of pride as a father, Joel even jokingly shares that it is a good enough accomplishment that her eldest, now in Grade 4, already surpassed his achievements in school.

For Edna, the Pantawid Pamilya program opened a lot of opportunities for their family. As she surveys her house today and sees the wooden table and chairs her husband has built himself, she can never be more satisfied.

Her plastic table and chairs may have been broken before, but the wooden versions of these inside her home now signify a more concrete desire to reach their dream of a better life for their family.. with reports from MCAndrade***