He may be seen us “under” or “takot sa asawa;” but, Maximino Viñas Jr. does not care a bit.

Maximino, 39, fondly details how he would oftentimes tell his co-farmers to rush doing things at work because he still has to wash clothes at home.

“Hindi ako nahihiya dahil ito naman talaga ang nangyayari sa amin,” shared Maximino, a resident of Brgy. Buenavista in Candelaria, Quezon Province.

For him, it is not about fearing his wife. It is all about sharing their responsibilities at home as husband and wife.

According to Maximino, he’ll never be ashamed of this because this practice does not only boost his wife’s confidence but most importantly, it ensures a harmonious relationship at home with their four children.

Shared responsibilities at home

Maximino admits that they used to be a family where he, as the father, was the main provider for their needs. He worked as a jeepney driver in Manila while his wife, 38-year-old Marina, stayed at home with their children.

Things changed, however, when unfortunate instances forced him to leave his work and stay in their province.

Since then, Maximino and Marina decided to share responsibilities at home. Despite being unconventional, they embraced such change and surprisingly, things work out for the better.

“Talaga palang mahirap ang mga gawaing bahay. Wala akong pang-araw-araw na hanapbuhay, s’ya (referring to his wife) ngayon ang nagtatrabaho kaya ako ang gumagampan sa mga gawaing bahay,” shared Maximino.

Marina is happy of this setup at home.

“Kinakailangan talagang magtulong ng mag-asawa lalong lalo na sa pagpapalaki ng mga anak. Ang gusto lang naman namin ay masuportahan ang pangangailangan ng mga bata,” she shared.

Besides the responsibilities at home, the couple also ensures that every decision is shared.

“Yung pantay na desisyon namin ay maganda ang naitutulong sa pamilya namin. Napag-uusapan namin ang lahat ng bagay katulad ng pagdidisiplina at pag-aaral ng mga bata. Sa tingin ko, mas napapaunlad nito ang aming pamilya,” said Maximino.

Marina added that their children never question their words as they know that every decision in the family has been discussed between the two of them.

Gender equality in the community

Maximino and Marina’s family is a beneficiary of the Pantawid Pamilyang Pilipino Program of the Department of Social Welfare and Development (DSWD) since 2012.

The Pantawid Pamilya is a human capital development program of the national government that supports the needs on health, nutrition and education of zero to 18 years old children from qualified poor families. The program provides cash subsidies to beneficiaries in exchange for their compliance to conditions such as monthly attendance to school and monthly preventive health checkups.

The couple agrees that the cash grants provided by the program helped in the health and education of their children; however, they are more grateful to the lessons the program has taught them along the way.

As a mother-grantee, Marina attends monthly Family Development Sessions (FDS) as part of her co-responsibilities in the program.

The FDS is a monthly gathering of Pantawid Pamilya parent-grantees that teaches them on various topics including strengthening marital relationships, child’s rights, financial management and disaster preparedness among others.

“Natuto ako ng mas maayos na pagpapamilya at pakikisalamuha sa ibang tao,” shared Marina.

Maximino, on the other hand, has been given the opportunity to attend the Gender Sensitivity Training for Male Spouses as part of the Pantawid Pamilya’s advocacy on gender and development.
According to him, this opportunity only fueled his confidence that what they are doing in their family is right and should be continued.

“Walang dapat mas nakakaangat sa isang pamilya para mas maganda ang samahan. Sa tingin ko, kung magiging ganito ang bawat pamilya, magiging mas maayos at mas maunlad ang pamayanan dahil mayroong pagkakaunawaan,” said Maximino.

Marina can never agree more with her husband.

“Nagkaroon ako ng mas malaking tiwala sa sarili ko dahil hindi lang pala ako sa bahay lang. Mas lumawak ‘yung nakakasalamuha ko at mas naging maayos ang pamilya namin,” she happily shared.

For the Viñas couple, they’ll never be ashamed of their family setup as they know this can better help them achieve their dreams for their children.

“Sa aming pagtutulungan, mapapagtapos namin sila sa pag-aaral at maiiwas namin sila sa pag-apak sa tubigan (rice fields) para lang mabuhay. Sa ganitong paraan, mas magiging maayos ang kanilang kinabukasan,” a positive Maximino shared.

No matter how hard life is, what matters to them right now is they are all set to a good future as they intend to continue working hand in hand for their children.#